1.
以前找男友要五官端正,
后来就要求五官在脸上,
再后来只要求有五官就行。
现在找男友比找工作还难,呵呵!
2.
美国一黑人想参选总统(不是指Obama),一白人问他:
“你为什么要竞选总统?”
“我想改变美国。”
“假如你当选,你要做的第一件事是什么?”
“我马上把‘白宫’改为‘黑宫’。”
3.
父亲:儿子,咱们回家了。
儿子:我上幼儿园时全托,你们一周来一次;读小学时住校,你们也一周来一次。
将来你们老了我就送你们去养老院,我也一周去看你们一次。
4.
一农夫送其子去学校念书,经考
5.
快会考的时候了,有一天上地理课,老师在上面报一个地名,让我们就在下面回答当地所出的矿产。说了很多地方以后,老师突然问了一句:“江南产什么?”全班男生齐声回答:“江南产美女!”
6.
英语老师嫌我们几个男生不听讲,大怒道:“你们想什么呢?”我当时懵了,也不知怎么的就说了一句:“想你呢!”教室里沉默半晌,只是一双双惊恐的眼睛在望着我。女老师呆了一会儿,后指着我大骂:“你就是一个臭流氓!”冤啦!
7.
一老师向学生解释:“奇迹”一词时,举了一个例子:“一个人从5楼跳下,竟毫发未损。”他希望学生说出“奇迹”一词。可一学生说:“幸运” 。老师很失望,又说:“此人爬上5楼,又跳下,还是未受伤。又一学生说:”“偶然。”老师非常气愤,只好又说:“那人再爬上5楼,又跳下来……”没等老师说完,就有学生说:“他习惯了。”
8.
Aunt:How did Lily do her history examination?
Mother: Oh, not at all well, but there, it wasn’t her fault. Why, they asked her things that happened before the poor girl was born.
9.
Student: Teacher, why did you say that all the false are ugly?
Teacher: That’s certainly true. Couldn’t you give me an opposite example?
Student: Oh, yes. Look at yourself, when you put on your false teeth, you look younger and lively; when you get them off, your mouth looks empty and shriveled, that’s really ugly. Isn’t that an opposite example?
10.
Teacher: What’s the difference between a zoo and a park?
Student: A zoo is a place occupied by many kinds of animals; a park is a place occupied by one kind of animal only.


liuth55
似水流年
校园生活
毕业生的“窝”
单身派对